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Life is not easy for any of us. But what of that? We must have perseverance and above all confidence in ourselves. We must believe that we are gifted for something, and that this thing, at whatever cost, must be attained. – Marie Curie rafting a life you love begins with cultivating your confi- dence. People often speak of confidence as if it's something someone gives us or we pick up along the side of the road. As if we could spot confidence hanging out on the side of Tamiami Trail, swing by and fill ourselves up. Confidence is often conveyed, at least in part, by our parents, but that is often not the case for many people. Ultimately, true confidence is a gift we must give ourselves. For some it comes naturally when they are young, but life can quickly erode away youthful confidence. An extraction is usually in order as we age to dig away the layers of self-doubt created by life's perceived failures. First and foremost, we must give ourselves permission to be happy and confident. Women are amazing creatures, steeped in meaningfulness and feel- ings. It's no wonder modern times has us reeling with our emotions and how to rectify our self-worth in a world turned upside down in the last century. We are struggling with the demands of daily life and the dreams of tomorrow, trying desperately to find our balance amidst the chaos. Here are a few helpful steps to help you unearth the god- dess living just below the surface of your life. She is beautiful from the inside out and radiates confidence like beams of light through a dark night sky. Seek Support Feminine energy naturally thrives in an environment of inclusion, much like the majestic redwood trees of California that support their vast weight by intertwining their roots among the rocks, plants and roots of fellow trees. eir surprisingly shallow root structure could never support the massive trunk if not for this evolutionary example of community. Women, too, need an environment of support to survive and thrive. Cultivate a tribe of supporters—women who are positive influences and fill your life with joy. Move On e greatest obstacles to female success may, in fact, be our propensity to dwell on mistakes and an inability to shut out the outside world. Women sometimes let small missteps define them. It's important to realize that inside every perceived failure is a learning experience. Some of the most successful people in the world experienced devastat- ing failures before realizing their greatest success. What often appears to be a major setback can actually be a valuable detour that leads you in a vibrant new direction. Accept when one door closes, pivot and step into the next one waiting for you just ahead. Be a Unicorn A critical element of confidence is a willingness to be different, to break free of the mold society deems appropriate. Step out of your comfort zone and work toward goals that come from your own values and needs that aren't determined by society. It is not only the ability to risk failure, but the willingness to stand out from the crowd that fuels confidence. Stop Overthinking One of the most debilitating habits responsible for women's lack of confidence is overthinking. We spend far too much time beating ourselves up and replaying scenarios in our heads. Studies show that women dwell on problems significantly more than they think about solutions. End this cycle by taking action or deciding to let it be; regardless what direction you choose, stop overthinking. Banish Negativity It goes without saying that women are much harder on themselves than anyone else ever would be. If anyone spoke to us the way we talk to ourselves, we would probably punch him or her. To succeed we need to stop punishing ourselves and reverse negative thoughts into positive reinforcement. It will take some time to retrain your brain, but the results can be life-changing. When a negative thought pops into your head, turn it around and put a positive spin on it. Talk to yourself like you would your child or beloved friend. Be your own best friend. Write Your Story Instead of thinking the world is against you, imagine the world is conspiring to bring you everything you wish. Hundreds of books have been written on the power of suggestion and visualizing your way into happiness. All theories basically boil down to one concept—you become the stories you tell yourself. So, make your story a good one. C In order to be irreplaceable one must always be different. – Coco Chanel 12 | GRAVITAS MAGAZINE GravitasMag.com

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