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Subscribe at GravitasMag.com | 27 OK , at least I k now where you stand. It ended up being a great opportunity that allowed me to grow. When I went in my goal was to be there four years. I had a chance to see what I enjoyed most, which was strateg y, and helping leaders be more effective. Being able to see the inside of a large company, the people, the processes, the systems and the discipline around those processes—that is what creates the exceptional experience that people are aracted to. When the four-year mark came, I realized I didn't have a plan. I got frustrated with myself. So in 2005, I started my three-year plan and started my business on the side. A ll of my vacation time went to ser ving clients. I saved my money, so I would have enough money in reser ve. A nd at the end of that time, I resigned and never looked back. at was 2008, we all k now what was going on then. 2008 was an interesting time to jump off the cliff. Actually, I think it was the best time, because organizations were look ing to do things with more disciple. ey didn't have the luxur y to say, "We're doing well, we don't need that." How did you carve out your place in male dominated industries? It was ver y beneficial to have a man tell me I could do whatever I want that was my father. Nobody said, you can't; not in my inner most circle. A nd I think it's important to give that to others maybe don't have that k ind of inner circle. I had structure but not boundaries. Nobody ever told me, you should be this. I was able to figure that out on my own. I've worked around men predominately, but I've never felt that I needed to be like a man. I love being a woman. I love the femininity of a woman. I love the intelligence of a women. I like substantive conversations, and I like football. If your wife or your girlfriend does not like football, please don't bring her to my house on Sunday. I'm not going to entertain her. I'm watching the game. Where did you get your confidence and how do help others find it? First of all, you have to have the courage to allow confidence to surface. I believe part of it came from my nurturing. My mother is ver y independent, even now at 80. She was a leader in the community and required us to ser ve the community. She taught me to stand up for what is right. She would tell me, "Honey, sometimes you have to be the voice for people, when they are too ignorant to do it for themselves." So, having a voice was always familiar to me. A nd my father always talked to us about being young ladies and not being afraid to be different. A lso part of it was my makeup was my mindset. I'm ver y independent, which can be stubbornness, but when tempered can be confidence. Over time, I became more comfortable with who I am, what I believe, what I k now is right for me. K nowing that if I don't walk in confidence, then I will be the doormat for somebody else and I'm not able to live with that. I'm OK with conflict and disagreement. Other peoples judgement of what I should be doing , that made me fight even harder. Confidence comes with embracing who you are with all of your imperfections. It comes from my desire to fully live the way LaFern wants to live. A nd not just living my life fully but, helping others do the same. I think it's a shame for someone to go through life and not get a taste of joy and happiness and fulfillment, because of the choices they are too afraid to make, that will make them uncomfortable. So I love work ing with people who don't mind being stretched. I want to be the boot camp instructor for your mind. I am going to challenge the way you think. Not to get you upset but, to make you consider a different perspective, even if you don't embrace it. My goal is to die empty, or as close as I can get. To do all that I desire to do, can do, think that I was built to do. I don't have to do it for a lifetime, maybe I' ll just do it for the weekend. Tr y it: see what it feels like. Life changed for me when I started changing my expectations. " TOP TO BOTTOM: LaFern after running a half-marathon in the Washington D.C. With one of her inspirations, Oprah Winfrey. LaFern with her brothers and sisters celebrating her mother's 80th birthday. Continued on page 31

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